You have all watched me lose 70 lbs! Whats next? No you don’t keep losing. No you don’t diet forever. Now the hard part begins… balance.
I surpassed my goal weight. Now to maintain my weight, while LIVING a balanced lifestyle. This is me trying to find my peace somewhere in the middle of it all. This might be harder than gaining weight, or losing it. PHEW!
I made an announcement 1 week ago that I will no longer be competing in the upcoming NPC competition that I had selected for myself.
Read the post here:
Nutshell: It was not the right time in my life. I had been dieting and working towards a goal of some sort for the last 2.5 years. I had yet to just live!!
Well I’d love to just UPDATE YOU! I have been living that is for sure!! I have been really great about following a maintenance plan of 1800-2100 calories a week, doing weekly yoga, and Insanity Max 30, but on the weekends… boy do I ever need to real it back in. Dinner, after dinner, after lunch, after eating out after more eating out. I forgot how difficult it can be to just hang out on the weekends and not want to go out and eat and drink with friends! I have kept my weight at a steady place since January 20th. But these last two weekends have really caused me to feel overly bloated, itchy and tired. (again I am looking to find balance, so I may have stumbled here, but I am getting back up again.) I have been doing cardio and lifting all weekend to use some energy up. My clothes fit the same, but I have the fluff I knew that would come with the territory.
I did a personality test on myself and I was told that I am a 50% RED/RUBY 50% YELLOW/DIAMOND: Which means: I have a strong personality type, I am highly driven, but also I live in the moment and I am driven by fun! On the weekends all I want to do is go out and have fun, and that often involves eating and drinking wine! Lots of delicious wine! So here I am totally bloated, and feeling the gains! I am not sure how I want to approach this. I feel very lost and un motivated to try to do anything about it. I have gained around 5-10 LBs and I imagine it is water weight mostly, but it is still hard to see after having worked so hard previously. I know my goals are to live and exist and oh have I ever been so happy … just living! In fact I have not been this at peace in a very long time. We are going to Texas next weekend, and I do want to enjoy the foods, and live entertainment. My plan is to practice as much balance as I can while I am there. Leading up to the trip I will follow the 1800-2000 calorie 21 Day Fix Extreme Eating plan while doing the workouts (my maintenance calories), Yoga, and Insanity Max 30. I will also drink 1 gallon of water a day, and just try to not pay attention to the bloating.
Bloating is normal. It was something I knew would happen, I am just working on accepting that. My husband says I look bright, happy, glowing, fit, and healthy. Most of this crap is all in my head! Today I received my 21 Day Fix Extreme program, and I looked at it with anxiety. I am not sure I am ready to tackle a diet, but I know Cancun is coming up and I want to feel my best in my bikini. I am doing plenty of soul searching this week to figure out what I want to do. I know I want to start a program when I get home from Texas, but I am not sure how extreme I want to go. I am probably going to slide into a moderate plan and then work my way into something more extreme leading up to the Cancun trip. I am all or nothing type of gal, so trying to do something moderately is really difficult for me. This is why I suffered with issues with alcohol. I used to not be able to just have 1 drink. I needed to have 2-3 if I was going to go out. I couldn’t just have 1 of the desserts, I needed to try 2-3 or 3. So the moderate/balance lifestyle is so so difficult for me. I need to find a way to do it though. Life cannot be extremes at all times! I need to find my happy place in the middle. I am a lot closer today than I was 2 years ago that is for certain! Life is a series of days, events, experiences that lead to big wisdom and peace.
So here is a glimpse into my eating:
3 egg whites/1egg
1/2 cup of oatmeal
1 tbl spoon of almond butter
1 tbls spoon of peanut butter
Ground Beef in a taco bowl
or some sort of protein and carb
or no carb
1 – 1 1/2 glass of wine
So you see … 80/20 is being practiced here. Its not to bad… until THE WEEKEND
The weekend comes alone and my body says “FEED ME!!! GIVE ME ALL THAT YOU HAVE MISSED OUT ON FOR MONTHS.” And it is so so hard to control that voice in your head when you do not have a goal to work towards. Well I do have a goal, but not a goal date!
I think I have almost all of it out of my system. I never really gorge, I eat that stuff until I am full, but then I am left feeling yucky and bloated. But, like I said in my post… I want to find balance, and I wont find it living in an extreme. I will finding it experimenting some where in the middle of it all. Wish me luck!!
Here I go!